What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Why do women change that much more with age?

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Strange and unknown radio waves coming from under the Antarctic ice "defy particle physics" - Earth.com

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Do you think some men have sex with prostitutes because they're too afraid to talk to women? Money does the talking for them.

Make Nazis afraid again!

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Why do some men like older women?

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

How do people develop stage 4 cancer without noticing until it’s too late?

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

What's the most incredible coincidence that ever happened to you?

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

How do I study with focus and concentration and avoid distractions and procrastination?

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

TEXT:

Do women really cheat more than men?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Why do Democrats call any Republican "Magats", like they are subhuman?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Have your parents ever walked in on you?

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Why does Islam give a bad vibe?

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”